My name is Angela. I live in New York State in the US with my husband of 37 years, who has always been my rock. I have Stage 4, Grade 3A.
I love my family more than anything. My greatest joy in life comes from being the mom to my son and daughter. While both have “grown and flown,” they took it upon themselves to live at and work from “home” during my difficult year (2024). My puppy, “Poppy,” adds an indescribable dimension to my life. My husband and I have an amazing community and network of family and friends.
Other loves of my life: friend time, long walks, rainbows, art, quotes, movies, positive energy, stillness, historical fiction books, Broadway musicals, Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food, happy hour, flying pigs, adult coloring (my meditation), Schitt’s Creek, Ted Lasso, the Adirondacks, New York City, Sedona (Arizona), and New England autumns.
In January of 2024, at the age of 59, I was diagnosed with FL. By the time I obtained a second opinion at Dana-Farber (April 2024), my cancer had transformed to Double-Hit FL+DLBCL. At the time, I didn’t think I was experiencing any symptoms; however, in retrospect, I might have confused some with menopause.
I knew something was seriously wrong in December of 2023 after I had an optional Heart CT scan to see if my climbing cholesterol was causing any problems. When the results hit my portal, I had been enjoying coffee with my husband on a Sunday morning. After reading the report, I remember looking over at him and saying, “Oh no. I’m in trouble!” While my heart was healthy, the scan had picked up some suspicious masses in my abdominal area.
I knew something bad was happening because, less than two years prior, imaging showed the area to be okay. It was new growth! Some background… In 2022, I was diagnosed with early-stage breast cancer. (Unrelated, I’m told.) At the time, a Breast MRI incidentally showed spots on my liver. A subsequent Liver MRI determined the spots to be benign hemangiomas. That’s it.
My FL diagnosis came abruptly with an unplanned phone call from the biopsy surgeon in January of 2024. She was rushed, vague, and cold. The doctor didn’t even call it FL – referring to it as “b-cell lymphoma,” a better alternative to other possible diagnoses, and “nothing remarkable.” (She’s no longer on my team.)
In April 2025, I received the welcomed news that I was in remission. Last summer, my R-CHOP treatment yielded a partial response. It was then followed by radiation therapy (December) to tackle the residual disease in my right adrenal gland. I am currently being watched and will be monitored every six months.
I found both R-CHOP and radiation therapy to be quite challenging. I guess I’m just one of those people who tends to get side effects on all the lists – “common,” “possible,” and “rare.” Over the past year, I’ve come to the realization that “living” and “existing” are two completely different things. This will surely inform my future treatment decisions. I want to live!
Breaking the news to my kids and my parents… anticipating a diagnosis… waiting for results… patience… dealing with symptoms and side effects… grieving an “old” life… communicating updates… wrestling with insurance… contemplating mortality… “scanxiety”… fearing secondary cancers… fading relationships… modified plans/dreams/goals… changes in appearance… mental and emotional health… looming relapse… the thought of enduring more treatment… rebuilding my life with uncertainty.
The love and support of family, friends, community… the life we’ve built… my compassionate and competent care team… the resilience of my body… unending hope… medical science.
I highly recommend aligning with a palliative care group. I really wish I had found it earlier in my journey. Game changer. Palliative care is not just for end-of-life assistance. It improves quality of life by helping with physical pain, side effects, symptoms, mental and emotional stress, and suffering. At any age. At any stage of life.
My other bit of advice is to be the “boss” of your own life and health. Assemble the best care team for YOU. That sometimes means you’ll have to fire people. Ask questions. Do your research. Advocate for yourself. Get a second opinion.
